Post by michihunter on Jul 13, 2006 6:40:11 GMT -5
>>Jeff Foxworthy's Version of Michigan
>>
>>If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through
>>18
>>inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will
>>swim
>>by, you might live in Michigan
>>
>>If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights
>>each
>>year because Pelston is the coldest spot in the nation, you might
>>live
>>in Michigan
>>
>>If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March,
>>you
>>might live in Michigan
>>
>>If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the
>>year, you might live in Michigan.
>>
>>If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work
>>there,
>>you might live in Michigan
>>
>>If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of
>>his
>>forehead, you might live in Michigan
>>
>>If you have worn shorts and a coat at the same time, you might live
>>in
>>Michigan
>>
>>If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might
>>live in
>>Michigan
>>
>>If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who
>>dialed
>>a wrong number, you might live in Michigan
>>
>>You know you're a true MICHIGANDER when.............
>>
>>1. "Vacation" means going up north on I-75.
>>
>>2. You measure distance in hours.
>>
>>3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.
>>
>>4. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
>>
>>5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging
>>blizzard,
>>without flinching.
>>
>>6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including
>>weddings).
>>
>>7. You install security lights on yo! ur house and garage and leave
>>both
>>unlocked.
>>
>>8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows
>>how to
>>use them.
>>
>>9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
>>
>>10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled
>>with
>>snow.
>>
>>11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and
>>road
>>construction.
>>
>>12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.
>>
>>13. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to
>>your
>>blue spruce.
>>
>>14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.
>>
>>15. Down South to you means Ohio
>>
>>16. A brat is something you eat.
>>
>>17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole shed.
>>
>>18. You go out to fish fry every Friday.
>>
>>19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.
>>
>>20. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.
>>
>>21. You find 0 degrees "a little chilly."
>>
>>22. You drink pop and bake with soda.
>>
>>23. Your doctor tells you to drink Vernors and you know it's not
>>medicine.
>>
>>24. You know what a Yooper is.
>>
>>25. You think owning a Honda is Un American.
>>
>>26. You know that UP is a place not a direction
>>
>>27. You know it's possible to live in a thumb.
>>
>>28. You understand that when visiting Detroit, the best thing to
>>wear is
>>a Kevlar vest.
>>
>>29. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to
>>all
>>your Michigan friends.
>>
>>If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through
>>18
>>inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will
>>swim
>>by, you might live in Michigan
>>
>>If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights
>>each
>>year because Pelston is the coldest spot in the nation, you might
>>live
>>in Michigan
>>
>>If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March,
>>you
>>might live in Michigan
>>
>>If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the
>>year, you might live in Michigan.
>>
>>If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work
>>there,
>>you might live in Michigan
>>
>>If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of
>>his
>>forehead, you might live in Michigan
>>
>>If you have worn shorts and a coat at the same time, you might live
>>in
>>Michigan
>>
>>If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might
>>live in
>>Michigan
>>
>>If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who
>>dialed
>>a wrong number, you might live in Michigan
>>
>>You know you're a true MICHIGANDER when.............
>>
>>1. "Vacation" means going up north on I-75.
>>
>>2. You measure distance in hours.
>>
>>3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.
>>
>>4. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
>>
>>5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging
>>blizzard,
>>without flinching.
>>
>>6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including
>>weddings).
>>
>>7. You install security lights on yo! ur house and garage and leave
>>both
>>unlocked.
>>
>>8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows
>>how to
>>use them.
>>
>>9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
>>
>>10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled
>>with
>>snow.
>>
>>11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and
>>road
>>construction.
>>
>>12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.
>>
>>13. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to
>>your
>>blue spruce.
>>
>>14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.
>>
>>15. Down South to you means Ohio
>>
>>16. A brat is something you eat.
>>
>>17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole shed.
>>
>>18. You go out to fish fry every Friday.
>>
>>19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.
>>
>>20. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.
>>
>>21. You find 0 degrees "a little chilly."
>>
>>22. You drink pop and bake with soda.
>>
>>23. Your doctor tells you to drink Vernors and you know it's not
>>medicine.
>>
>>24. You know what a Yooper is.
>>
>>25. You think owning a Honda is Un American.
>>
>>26. You know that UP is a place not a direction
>>
>>27. You know it's possible to live in a thumb.
>>
>>28. You understand that when visiting Detroit, the best thing to
>>wear is
>>a Kevlar vest.
>>
>>29. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to
>>all
>>your Michigan friends.
;D